I wonder, whether this world is really coming to an end soon? With all the floods in our nearby countries…is it better that this end comes so fast? I don’t know. Much as we like to speculate, this is all in God’s timing. What is His timing? Only God knows. Can we predict? We can’t. He has the cards in His hands. We are just pawns…?
Sometimes, people just use us for a certain moment in life. Some friends stick to you only when they aren’t hanging out with their love. I used to have such friend. Would I term this as friendship? I won’t. What’s friendship, if you can’t share both happy and sad moments? What’s friendship, if you have to only present a certain part of yourself to that party? What’s friendship, if you have to deliberately sieve out things and not talk to him/her about it? Is this called friendship, or just a matter of convenience, or simply, boliao???
It has nothing to do with the friends’ morality issues. I don’t judge people in this way. But rather, how much we can both share, what’s our quality of time spend together, do we really care…? Right now, stepping out of darkness, I really see, why God stirred this heart of mine, not once but twice. He absolutely knows what I would be going through. Looking back, I really thank God for His people in my life.
Is there any point to do fault-finding? Sometimes, why we don’t do what we should do is due to the absence of the heart. I believe, if you truly want something, you would go through all hardships to get that. Having said that, do I really know what I want? I can’t determine for sure, hence I might as well stand here, this moment in time. I can’t be hurried. I need awful lots of time. Time for myself, for activities, for my body, for my mind, for my likes…up till now, I still find myself finding for more time. It’s rather insane, and unbelievable right? Who on earth can have the luxury of time? Who on earth can’t move fast? Interestingly enough, I love speed. I love racing cars, I love racing bikes…I used to watch the Formula Racing Challenges on RTM1/2 when much younger. I always thought it’s cool to wear helmet and step on the accelerator, sit in the racing car…hmmmm!
Been trying to eat salad these days. Gotta cleanse my body…rid of toxins. Actually, my body has high metabolism rate. Well, that’s why it matters to me alot where the restrooms are! Lol. It’s getting too crowded in this small nation. I want green pastures. I want space. I want to see the sky. Oh well, I might as well be the cow/sheep/goat/ horse… (^_^)
Keep playing JJ Lin’s 江南. I like the melody…and the lyrics, despite that I’ve never really encountered such a situation and feeling for it. I thought it sounded so 凄美. Romantically sadly beautiful and melodious. Oh well, I am a masochist. Oh well…I love comedies but love sad melodious songs. Balance them up, I shouldn’t be that much of a masochist right? I also like the Korean Pop, happy happy dance dance dance. So carefree, so chirpy, full of energy! Japanese Pop belongs to another category for me. Nothing can replace that. But well, my obssession may not last long either. 3 months would be the limit? Hahaha…else more than that, I think I can start plucking my hair out.
I am so looking forward to a break! I need to break away from my routine. Routine makes me mad. Find it stifling. It’s pretty easy though, no need to kill more braincells, but is that healthy for my growth? Nope. I would need a break. Breathe in the fresh air!
Cool…down…relax…close my eyes…SLEEP!