Dress from Vertical Club

Royal Purple With a white belt I thought I looked much too feminine and demure in this. That’s not what I wanted. Obviously what I thought it was, is not what it is in reality. Does this happen all the time? No. Only with regards to clothings, Yes. Others, no. I take heed of what I am aware right from the start. With no regret. Hardhearted person I am one, I’m fine with that. Kindhearted I shall be, to people who love me so much. Thank you.

30 July this year was a special moment for me. Suddenly, I feel so senior. Hahaha! But at the same time, I thank God, for I’ve been waiting very patiently for this and such moment for so so so long. God shows me the faith, and this has been such a long journey of wait. I look forward to more special and warm moments in life 🙂

Because God first loved us, that’s how I know love. I may not know how to love as perfect as God’s, but I’m making steps forward. And I really can see, that shining glory from God’s love. I know very well, by now, how to pray and have prayers answered. That’s why I keep telling myself, I must have good thoughts and not the bad ones. I must be consistent and not irregular. This is not an easy task. Because millions of thoughts keep floating by. How many of us can just keep the thoughts at bay? The only solution, flood your life with good thoughts. I’m glad we’re optimists. I can’t imagine whining and lamenting my life away without making any change.

The only constant thing in life is change. How ironic.

In my blues……?

Top: Apica Bottom: Zara

Very soon 🙂 awaiting… I’ve been waiting for so long, some 13 years ago… Really finally, very soon. I don’t know whether there are words to describe how I really feel. As a planner, I know very well, there are some things not within our control. For circumstances change, people change, moods change… Will our values change? Mentality? Behaviour? Personality?

God is good. Maybe He’s rewarding me for my super big patience? I know, I can be very patient. Far too patient, till I procrastinate or chuck it aside? Things and people that matter to me, God hears my prayers. Very clearly. I say exactly what my heart wants. God hears them loud and clear…sometimes, I actually find this…rather scary?

Polka dots blue dress with Peach cardigan

Trying to look prim and proper here. Ok, ‘look’. What’s wrong with this word?

Everyone has certain set of expectations. But do u really think that we can satisfy everyone’s expectations? But of course, the first question I want to ask of myself is: Why in the world am I satisfying other’s expectations of me?…Suddenly I just realise, when some people just keep trying to be someone’s expectations, he/she is actually going down this never-ending cycle…it’s spiral. Being a dog?…I love dogs. But not being one.

I am a selfish person in this aspect. I don’t like to conform, much less to live my way of life, just because someone likes that for me.

Midnight blue dress from Vertical Club

I’m happy with my previous shopping trip in HK. Had plenty of dim sum to eat and nice malls to walk around. Maybe I miss Japan so much, that I ended up going to the Japanese Shopping centre in HK island. Still, this can’t be replacing Japan…I understand, what it meant by crying…crying for what you miss…what you long for…I may be a block, but I do feel very strongly, when I do feel…

I’m an oddball. I don’t live by what people expect of me. I expect that from myself. My mum has been very right, maybe afterall, she recognizes her own kind? I don’t know. Perhaps. Anyway, I do what I think i want of myself.

Yes, sometimes I get very bored. And I start to think of all the possibilities, that this place won’t be one that I’ll be in for long. How do you survive when your heart is not here??? My friend and I share the same sentiments. We must have been born at the wrong place at the wrong time! Lol…

Maybe someday i’ll check out Korea. But till now, I’m still very reluctant about going there…I don’t know. Just my head. I’m that obstinate. I wonder, why I am so obstinate. It’s quite exasperating. I can psycho myself into liking something, or perhaps even someone…but at the end of the day, the string that tugs my heart…I know, I’ll just have that genuine smile at those I love…deeply and hold closely to my heart. It doesn’t mean that the longer you know someone, the more you know about or love of him/her. I think, my heart searches for the heart. I suppose, the good knows the good…likewise for the other end.

Okie, healthy lifestyle, healthy future 🙂

年少时候

年少时候谁没有梦? 年纪大了谁没有思念? 或许我是一块大木头 或许我不懂得依靠 想见的人是否怡然会出现在我眼前? 几时呢? 有时候我认为 感觉不放过。 有时候我认为 一步一步来。 再次相逢 必定会欢喜。

我追求的是 那一副欣慰的笑容 笑容最甜蜜 然而 深深留下烙印的却是声音。

Dark green dress from MNG

It’s easier to wear a dress. No need to think. No need brains. Just do it. Just wear it. No need to think of color coordination. No need to think of outrageous patterns or clash. Just wear it.

Yea, I’m tired. I don’t want to use my brain. I want to use only my heart. Can I? What’s the point of using brain? Do people end up really much happier here?

Just like what my friend said, he wouldn’t mind being a blue-collared worker elsewhere. Would I? Why didn’t I study to be a chef???? Why didn’t I pursue my interest to be a designer????

How many people are really happy? I wonder. How many people are deeply unhappy? I also wonder. I like to laugh. Does that mean I’m happy? I don’t like to dwell. Does that mean I’m free from worries? I like to move and not stay put. Does that mean I never make any mistake? We’ve been seeing aplenty of rainbows these days. God’s promise to us??? I know, I’m not ungrateful. God answered our prayers. It’s indeed a cheap, big and good house. Best of all, the agent didn’t even charge me a single cent for commission and yet he helped me with much of the paperwork. I’m very blessed, I know. Just that I still do have my low moments…….

Especially so when I’m stressed. I don’t like to be stressed. But when I’m tired and not getting enough rest, I’m stressed. And when I’m stressed, my mind malfunctions, my braincells get all hyper! But the flesh is weak….

I love this particular song by JJ Lim. 江南. Beautiful melody and lyrics. Thanks to a fren who went to attend a recent xinyao concert and knew that I would surely love the album, he bought me one. And yea, I love the songs by the early xinyao members…the later ones are only Cai Cun Jia and JJ Lim. I remembered attending an NTU play which Cai Cun Jia sang for that piece, 看见. The play was sad in a way…about the female ghost lingering the NTU lake…and yea, we used to have plenty of spiritual stories for that lake…

Music wise, I do like JJ Lim and Jay Chou’s fantasy music styles. At least they are much better than some crappy little girls or boys tales…but having said that, I love Big Bang. And recently, my fren and I realised, we both love Big Bang! Hahahaha! Ya, if Big Bang is here I would attend their concert! But then, Arashi is not even here 😦

Wearing leggings that made me feel fat

I can’t be bothered now. Fat fat…ugly ugly….messy messy….does it matter???? If it matters, what does that mean to u? To u people? That u are just being superficial???

So fake. Why do people enjoy such act?

I know I won’t understand. Coz I won’t be able to ‘hahahahahahaha’ when I really don’t like. For people who can, that’s their problem. I like to be unique, is this a problem? If it is, does it matter to me? It doesn’t. Because I’ve never liked Clones. Star Wars the Clone Wars. I like the movies! I think, they are brilliant…

I’m on clothes-BAN now. Lol. What???well, I am, and these days when I pass by the retail shops, I just tell myself, how poor the retail therapy experiences are over here…and hahaha, just take some while to get used to…I’m determined. I guess, with determination, I’m able to overcome temptation! I’m not such a weak-willed person, hence I know it just takes a few moments of being used to.

Maybe it helps that my mind is somewhere else…

Uniqlo and Zara

Bad dress sense. But I just can’t be bothered. The white top looks ugly on me…I used to like it, but now I look at it, I find it too ‘toot’ for me 😦

I like the Zara skirt for its small pleats 🙂 however, it’s very short. For a skirt. I don’t know how some women wear the short ones, how they get onto escalator etc. The material is light, hence it fly easily. I ought to have anticipated it.