Dark blue jumper

Rest and relax. Relax and rest. It’s easy to close our eyes to everything in life. Just think of only you yourself in the center of this universe. Blah……

We want to see the light. Without light, all things seem so unclear. Is the invention of dimmer a good thing? Whatever you don’t wanna see, just dim it. Sigh. How difference is this from the Ostrich scenario???

Focus is the key. People when confronted always like to distract you using all sorts of nonsense and reasoning it as if they are so damn logical. But truth is the truth, why hide or why refrain from addressing it? The more one chooses to play, the more disgusting it is. And it’s even more so when we expect that much from them.

Too bad, some people are just more concerned with themselves than to think of everyone at large. They still have not been awakened to this reality, that the world does not consist of you yourself alone. Care and share. Share and care. These are wonderful gestures in life 🙂

A simple dish of spaghetti with my fav bacon!

Homecooked dishes are the best 🙂 I get to select what I want to eat for the day, for the week, as according to how I feel like it. And best, it’s not as oily as those outside. In fact, I hardly use oil in my cooking. Well, some days I prefer to eat tamago salmon donburi, then I shall cook that. Other days I may prefer spaghetti in the mediterranean way, then I shall cook that. And sometimes, I prefer the teochew and foochew style, then yeah I shall cook that! I love the numerous permutations I can come up with. Now I’m just short of buying something for tempura. I realise, veggie and meat are very important components of my meal. I’m an absolute meat lover. But veggie plays a very important part as well. Lol, maybe in short, I just eat anything as long as I’m not allergic to the food. Hungry big eater. I think I eat alot. While out, I actually finished one plate of noodles and a plate of satay….many girls must have thought that I’m crazy. Eat so much, what about your weight and waistline??? Hmmm…I’ve never thought of these since young, and yea, I don’t think of these at all.

I thank God for my contractor who has been such a nice person. I thank God for this place that it’s actually done up in the way I love. I thank God for the best part, that I’ve met such a nice agent who’s not even my agent.

I thank God for looking after me all these while. The numerous angels He has sent, and is continously sending. I’m quite a scatterbrainer at times, I thank God for sending His angels to remind me.

I hope to be able to fully enjoy my time soon. I actually feel so cut- off from the civilized world as I haven’t really been out shopping for clothes and barang. Well, what surprises me is, why are there sales continuously??? Hmmm…..so tempting. Lol. Anyway, I’m still left with the bookcase. I need it very much. I’ve always wanted such bookcase. Keeping my fingers crossed that it’s still available!!!!

Lacy top from F21

It’s been such a long time since I last bought myself new clothings. Kinda get sick of buying only household stuffs. But when I’m out, I still think of buying nothing but household stuffs. Lol, silly dilemma I have 😀

Anyway, I told myself, to only buy those clothings that I think I most prob have greater difficulty in making them. So, I have to restrain myself from buying the usual ones. Anyway, I really have plenty of clothes, I think I don’t even need to recycle them for a month and a half…but then, there are certain types of clothes I love wearing, the lazy lounge wear kind lol…

Life is not just about you and I. Life is not just about kisses and goodbyes. Life is not just about romantic flings and sex. Life holds greater meanings than fluffy ones.

We all have a purpose in life. I think, those people who think of nothing but sex and excitement whole day long are just plain idiots. It only reveals how small their worlds are, and how tiny their brains are. Bird-brain…

I hope to accomplish all my stuffs asap. Many times I wish there are MORE of me, so that I can do many things within the same span of time. I vaguely recalled that when I was much younger, I also had the same wish. Frankly, I don’t fancy myself lazing around with nothing fruitful and beneficial to do. I know there’re other things for me to do, apart from my leisurely activities. System, system, I need to get everything fall into place and running first. Arghhh….being impatient is my greatest weakness. Being patient is my greatest strength. So contradicting right? Yup. I’m a dual.

I thank God for my friend who never fails to share his house tips with me. There are many things I may not be aware of, and yes I do need reminders. Having said that, I do know how to fix and set up electrical units, so I’m quite happy with my skills. But there are some things I need more reminders of.

Thank God. Though I’ve been very tired, I’m very happy. I just need to get into proper routine and hey presto! I’ve increased my energy level. Maybe that’s why I always conserved energy in the past!

Dessert :)

I love desserts 🙂 Cakes, or ice-creams, or those Chinese 甜汤 🙂 I’m not really big on the Japanese kind of desserts, tho their packaging have always enticed me 😛 Well, i’ll try to make their desserts one of these days as well. When I’m more apt and done with those French and Italian ones. I think I need to save more, to fund my hobbies. I’m not that into gadgets, tho I’ve been waiting like forever for the White iPhone. However, now that it’s coming out soon, I’m rather half- hearted about it. Because i think I should purchase the iPhone 5 instead. Anyway I’ll be getting my kawaii cover for the phone, so y in the world would I need the white one??? Hmmm….

So far i’m very pleased with my gadgets, hence I don’t think I’ll be spending more on them in the meanwhile. It’s more of my hobbies. And I’m still wondering about the piano. Would I have the time to complete so much? It does look as if I’m racing against time. I don’t want to waste my life pursuing for fame and riches. I just want to enjoy my life, have good and meaningful times, realizing my dreams and desires. I’m not exactly a nerdy person, I need arts to be in my life. I feel very stifled when I can’t be allowed to express my bottling creativity. I feel restless. When I was much younger, I would do origami and sewing almost daily during my holidays. I even loved doing the clay work and figurines. I really just can’t wait to lay my hands on them again.

I always have this particular dream in my heart. I may be working hard towards it…when I’m old and sipping tea…hahaha…

The Apple Green

Sigh. Have I ever changed???

Why do I look the same like the me of a few years ago??? ……

While I say I need some kind of change, what sort of change am I talking about? Habits, personality, attitude, style, or ……??? Maybe I feel bored with the same me. I do feel bored. Despite having so many things to occupy my time now. Despite having so many goals to achieve. Haha, for a moment I wonder, why is my clock ticking so fast? Is it a race against 2012???

We talk about 2012 with mixed feelings. Everyone keeps saying about the end of the world since dunno when. I rem, back in 2000, there’s also this big talk of end of the world. And before 2000, there’s also this talk about the then alive Saddam Hussein was the one who would end the world. Hmmm…so many speculations over the years. Who are we to say, yup, the Mayan were right in their calender? That yeah, the world is ending in 2012. It may not be about the end. End of the world per se. But perhaps end of other sorts of meaningless things?

Having said that, perhaps it’s better to be wiped out in that entre freak seconds. Just don’t prolong the suffering of seeing the pains of our loved ones, whether we be alive or not, it doesn’t matter. What matters, is don’t prolong. When I see my loved ones suffer, I feel sad and in pain. When they grieve, I grieve too. When they get bullied, I would stand up for them. I don’t believe in suffering in silence. It’s just a matter of who gets the last laugh. It’s so damn easy to manipulate some who are so dense in their minds. It’s so damn easy to implant certain thoughts and beliefs in the minds of the weak. How many strong minds have we seen these days? Definitely in the minority. Don’t ask me where I get my statistics. At least my unrecognized statistics don’t produce nonsense. Having spoken to numerous types of people, it’s not a difficult feat to identify the mindless ones right from the start. And for that, I’m very mindful. I love programming. Human minds can be programmed to some extent. Gurus may counter argue, but psychologically speaking, yes, we can implant certain things…

Because I know, I’m very wary of the information I receive. I’m a collector of information. But perhaps God’s really fair, I’m not being blessed with the gift of retention. I can’t retain all information. And hence, most of the time, secrets are really safe with me… Because I can’t retrieve them from my mind easily, they’re just being dropped to the bottom of my mind…forgotten…However, one surprising thing is, when giver reminds me of that, I’m able to recall…weird mind…good or bad?

I love Apple Green. I simply love Green. Except for muddy green. I love green grapes, green leafy veggies, green pears, green clothings, greenery..:) Ahem, green hat in the figurative way? Nope, I kick such out LOL.

Arghhh…I’m not done with what I’m supposed to buy yet. So many dozens of things!!!!

Random pic

Uncle finally managed to solve my problem! 🙂 Phew, yeah! Was so depressed earlier on, as I sat around thinking I had to fork out another sum of money 😦 But thank God, there are people, good people around who are helping me to save on costs as well 🙂 i wanna buy my mega item, hence I can’t spend on such stuff 😦 Just have to keep praying that all issues will be resolved.

Do u believe that prayers work? I do. I have numerous answered prayers, especially when I pray for that, specifically. Sometimes, I do get scared with the answered prayers…I always remember, be mindful of what you are praying for, because God will give you that…Of coZ, sometimes I ask myself, oh REALLY? …… 🙂 I’m not asking for fame and riches. I just wonder at times, how is my ‘specific’ prayer gonna be answered? Really???… It’s silly, I know, despite the recent answered prayer…I still have such silly thoughts hindering my prayers.

But of coz, my daily prayer is for God to have mercy on Japan and her people. We all need blessings, but I think, the survivors of the prefectures affected by the tsunamis need the utmost blessings. I felt so sad when I read an account of a woman who tried to find her items in the debris. She was saying, all her photos were gone…so sad, this reminded me of a scene from ‘Titanic’. When Jack was in the sea, and asking Rose to be strong for herself, to live a life meaningfully without him…and the next moment, he sank into the sea, Goodbye forever…not a photo of him…very very very sad…okie, i’m a sucker for this movie…back to the affected prefectures, I can share with them this grief of not even recovering the photos…because some of their family members were gone, you kinda need some for keepsake…life’s made up of memories, and our human minds are so limited in what we chose to remember, the photos will be the best way…What he said was right. Now the words just keep playing in my head.

There are some things in life that I can be very bent on, and I will just keep praying for these. But somehow what I can’t get through is my part. My silly heart vs my logical mind. At the same time, I question myself, is this what I want? REALLY??? Maybe, I am not that sure/convinced of what I want actually…maybe I really prefer to have my personal space after all. I’m already finding lack of time for myself, and I’m very very unwilling to forgo time for myself. My ME- time is super duper important. When I don’t have that, I find myself unable to function that effectively. I need breathing space. Perhaps, now is really not the time. I’m not in that right frame of mind. And I definitely don’t like to rush into making a commitment and promising something I can’t and won’t.

Hahaha…by then, maybe this world will cease to exist…ya, I’m really that that slow 😀

A handicraft

Well, bumpz…tired…but meaningfully occupied and engaged. 24 hours a day aren’t enough for me. How I wish I have 36 hours! Lol. So that I can do more things! Or maybe, there should be two of ‘me’s, can accomplish tasks faster in the way I want. At the moment? It’s slow…but steady…just that my heart wants things to be done fast. My heart acts faster than my brain. Brain is slower, and keeps going through all the systematic processing analysing steps. Argh! Whereas my heart tends to echo the Nike slogan [Just Do It]. But still, there’s a limit to how much I can accomplish within a day. I can’t be too task focused till I lose the essence of communication. I still need to put aside time for care and share 🙂

Is that me? 🙂 🙂 🙂

Brown or white???

Initially wanted this. Thank God I didn’t make this purchase, else it would’ve been a wasted selection after all. It may well fit into my theme, but none the outstanding and spectacular. It’ll be just because I wanted to buy something. After several consultations with my various great friends whom we share similar taste preferences…our choice pointed out I actually don’t need to make much choices after all, as the other set won thumbs down 😀 Yea, much much more expensive…but being my ideal, and satisfying my childhood fantasy, I really can’t abandon this image, and not realizing it to reality. In life, who says friends aren’t important? They are super precious, they are the ones who really know me well…and are frank with their opinions and suggestions. I also know that they all meant well for me 🙂 and yes, with good friends, u’ll think for the best for them, u wouldn’t want to see them sad or down, u would want them to be happy 🙂 I don’t understand how people can be without friends, as in they only have ‘friends’ who eat drink and play w them. Apart from these, what else??? I wonder, don’t they share their thoughts and beliefs? Or rather, they’re just pretending to be someone else???

I don’t understand why there are people who make friends with a hidden agenda. To satisfy their hidden wants and needs? Aren’t we here to care and share as friends? Aren’t we here to look out for our friends?

Going according to my heart is best for me. My friends are very important to me. They’ve helped me to listen more to my heart and to love even more. Thank God for them! 🙂

Another shaggy :D

I’m in love with shaggy lol. I like my concept 🙂 hahaha, when I was much younger, I attempted interior designing on my own, doing up floor plans etc…

One regret could be: I didn’t pursue architecture. I like it alot. One of my acquaintances got into architecture in NUS. Why didn’t I apply then????

What my friend said was true to some extent…I wasn’t being myself earlier on. Did I see it? No I didn’t realise then. When I realised it, that’s when I stepped out. Am I a procrastinator, or I need more of a wake-up call?

I don’t like it when people impose their standards and expectations on you. I hate it when people think their norm is the only norm. I dislike it when people live in a well of their own.

Why should I be just like you? I’m one on my own. Why should u expect me to be like you? We ain’t born as twins.

Let me have the freedom and the trust will not be broken.